Banner courtesy Andrea

Thanks to Hastings and Connie!
Special thanks to Andrea for the speedy banner. I seriously LOVE it!

DREAM A LITTLE DREAM

"Brian?" Justin whispered the question. It had taken a good few minutes of contemplating for him to finally decide to wake his sleeping lover. "Brian? Are you up?"

The answer was obviously 'no,' but the fact didn't deter Justin. To emphasize his attempt, he gently shook Brian's arm.

A hazel eye focused on Justin's hovering face.

"What's wrong?" Brian asked, the concern evident in his voice. "You have a headache?"

Justin shook his head and leaned down to whisper, "Would you miss me if I died?"

Brian blinked once before opening both eyes. "What?"

Justin repeated his question.

This time, Brian's snort filled the entire room. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" he asked, annoyed. "Do you know what fucking time it is? Two am Justin! Two in the fucking morning! Why the hell aren't you asleep?"

Justin sighed. "I couldn't sleep." He tucked his head under Brian's neck. "I had a dream."

Brian sighed before running his fingers through Justin's hair. He knew Justin sometimes had nightmares...since his prom. "What kind of dream?"

"A bad one."

"What happened?"

"You died."

Brian squeezed him gently. "Well it's over now. So go back to sleep."

Justin rolled his eyes heavenward. "Brian!"

"What?"

"Is that all you have to say?"

Brian sighed, exasperated. "What the fuck do you want me to say? You had a bad dream; it's done and over with; you're awake now. I have to work in the morning. Let's go back to sleep."

Justin sat up to glare down at his lover before rolling over to his side of the bed. He counted to ten before he heard Brian's frustrated groan and felt a warm arm being slipped around his waist.

"You're such a fucking twat sometimes," Brian complained. He slipped a leg in between Justin's and said, "Want to talk about it?"

Justin shrugged and brattishly responded, "You should go to sleep. You have work in the morning."

Brian stifled a snort and opted instead to say in his most reasonable voice, "Fuck work. I want to hear about your dream."

Justin didn't need anymore encouragement. He quickly turned around so he was facing Brian. "Are you sure?"

Brian nodded and entwined their legs once more.

"You remember when we watched that Coldplay video today?" Justin asked.

Brian raised a brow. "What video?"

"The one with everything backwards?"

Brian had no idea what he was talking about but he nodded anyway.

"Well," Justin explained. "It was like that in my dream. Everything was backward."

"Yeah?"

Justin nodded. "We were in your jeep and you swirved to avoid hitting a truck. The jeep turned over a couple times...and you died."

Brian stroked Justin's face. "I'm here now though."

Justin lowered his lids. "I know...but it was so real, Brian."

Brian tipped Justin's chin up with his index finger so their gazes were locked. "This is real...that was a dream."

Justin nodded and accepted Brian's comforting kiss.

When he pulled away, he said, "Before the jeep flipped over and your head smashed against the windshield-"

"Justin."

"You told me the strangest things..."

"Strange things?" Brian cocked a brow. "Like 'I want to dress you up in leather and spank you' strange?"

Justin laughed. "Brian! Be serious!"

"Who's not being serious?"

Justin closed his eyes and remembered.

"Justin?"

Justin smiled wistfully.

"Justin!" Brian barked the warning.

"You told me I was lovely," Justin said, eyes still closed; the smile never leaving his face.

Brian watched in awe, as Justin repeated everything he 'supposedly' said in the dream.

"You told me you were sorry," Justin said. "And I said, 'Nobody said it was easy' and you said, 'No one ever said it would be this hard' and you asked me to go back to the start...the first night we met. Brian, do you remember?"

Brian smiled. How could he forget? "That's the night I made the biggest mistake of my life! I took home this little boy who refused to go back where he came from..." He laughed and Justin grinned.

***"Where you headed?"

"No place special."

"I can change that."***

"You told me to tell you that I loved you," Justin continued. "And we made love. It was so beautiful, Brian. Can you imagine the most wonderful feeling ever?"

Brian was thinking about it right now, being in his lover's arms.

"Triple that feeling," Justin said. "It was intense," he added with a drawn-out sigh.

Brian stroked Justin's pale cheek until the boy opened his blue eyes.

"And then we were in the jeep and..."

Brian pressed his lips against Justin's.

"I don't want anything to happen to you Brian," Justin said, his voice cracking slightly. "I don't know what I'd do."

Brian rubbed noses with the teen. "It's ok. Nothing's going to happen to me."

Justin nodded, satisfied. He closed his eyes and slowly began to doze off. Brian gently stroked his boy's arm, deep in thought.

"I would miss you if you died," he said softly.

"Mmm?" Justin murmured sleepily.

Brian kissed his forehead.

"You're not lovely to me," Brian said even softer. "But...beautiful."

Brian looked down and realized his partner was asleep...dead to the world. It was safe for him to say, "And I do love you. More than you could ever imagine. I am nothing without you, Justin. Absolutely nothing."

He brushed his lips against Justin's smooth forehead and pulled him into his arms.

03/01/03